Expectations

42 Replies

In the 80s

Expectations, or when drunken girls turn nerds into heroes….

I was reading a post by Lisa on “Zen and Pi” when an ancient memory came back, one I haven’t thought of, mostly likely since it happened all of those years ago.  First, I want to say that I don’t want to downplay her (Lisa’s) serious post with this bit of silliness, but there was something in there that brought this up.

One weekend night during my Senior year of college, one of my roommates and I went out drinking.  This was Ohio State, so this was a very big past-time 😉 All of the nightclubs were off of the southeast corner, while we lived off of the northeast corner of campus.  This is a huge campus…

We were both Introverts.  I don’t know about other college age Introverts, but back then I often had trouble going to clubs, though I did it all of the time.  The sensory overload makes my brain turn off.  I see all of the excitement around me and want to join, but don’t know where to start.  Back then it too often ended up with one or two too many beers.  No, I wouldn’t get sick or falling down drunk or anything like that (not often), but I might be a little more than just slightly tipsy.

It was very late on a very dark night as the two of us made our way back through campus.  Despite being Introverts, we were being pretty silly.  Nobody was around, so why not?  Actually, after a while I discovered that someone was around.  We were being followed…

Two young ladies, also a bit more tipsy than they should have been (perhaps a lot more tipsy than they should have been), were right behind us.  I think I became aware that they were purposefully following us when one made a Cagney and Lacey joke (for you young folk out there, that was a popular TV show about two female detectives.  Look it up.).  I tried to pretend I didn’t notice them, but I also listened into their conversation.

They were following us for their protection.

I’m not stupid and realized that it wasn’t that we were big, hulking hero types, believe me, we weren’t!, it was because they knew we were safe.  We pretty much had the word “nerd” written across our foreheads.  They didn’t tell us, but from their conversation I knew that their plan was that if anyone bothered them, they were with us.  And that was cool.  My roommate and I had a very short conversation and agreed that we’d keep more than half an eye on them and make sure they made it home safe and sound.  We might not have been hulking, but we were willing to play hero types for these ladies who placed their trust in us.

Just as we were about to pass out of campus, we realized that they were going to the last dorm that was coming up.  We turned and wished them goodnight.  They were obviously embarrassed to discover that we knew that they were there, or, more likely, that we acknowledge that we knew that they were there, but they thanked us for (sort of) walking them home.  We watched them until they reached the door.  They turned, waved and said “Thanks!  Goodnight!” and went in.  We turned and walked home.

I didn’t really think of campus as being a dangerous place, and there weren’t many reports of attacks, sexual or otherwise, on campus, but the women I knew back then wouldn’t walk across campus alone at night under the best of circumstances, and these two were pretty drunk.  Even though it was two of them, they didn’t feel safe until they tagged along with us.

Obviously my roommate and I didn’t do one thing different from normal.  If we did anything good or special, it wasn’t because we chose to do it but because we were chosen.  And I’m sure we were chosen for two reasons.  First, and most important, we were there.  Second, was that we were total nerds and so we were safe.  But the interesting thing is, since we were chosen, we would have lived up to any challenge that could have been thrown at us.  We would have fought to the death to protect our charges.  Thank goodness nothing happened 😉

So the next time you look at those that are there and initially think that they won’t do at all, raise your expectations and trust them.  You may be surprised that they will live up to those higher expectations.

— —

(See the photo at the top of the post?  The guy who is sitting with the keyboard in his lap was me within a year of the events of the story.  Not too intimidating, was I? ;) )

 

42 thoughts on “Expectations”

                1. trentpmcd Post author

                  It is very much the inside that matters. I feel young, so I must be, despite all of these memories, like this one, from the 1980s (and before) ;) Yep, pretty close to the same age. Not that the difference in actual birth dates is huge (but you’re still young)…

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                  1. ~M

                    And you do so much, it’s probably what keeps you so young. I doubt I’ll ever really feel old. You’ve got to grow up for that to happen and I decided long ago to never do that. 😉

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                    2. ~M

                      I love that plan…. I like to keep busy too, but my introverted side often keeps me hidden. 🙂 I’m currently enjoying an entire week away by myself and it’s pure bliss! 😉

                      Liked by 1 person

                    3. trentpmcd Post author

                      That does sound nice. I need a week alone. Most of what I do is great for introverts – the art/writing/music, the outdoors stuff, etc. I hope your week continues as pure bliss!

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                    4. ~M

                      Yes, and that’s the very same list of things I love to do. I’m surrounded by pine trees at the moment, in a cottage all my own. What more could a girl possibly want? I can sit outside and write all day, or be adventurous and go for a hike in the woods. The perfect place to be. Everyone needs time alone. I take a week off every year to do this.

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                    5. trentpmcd Post author

                      It does sound perfect! I have a little cottage on Cape Cod and get away a little, but I also bring it all with me most of the time… I need to spend more time with just me down there.

                      Liked by 1 person

                    6. ~M

                      I bet it’s the perfect place… Cape Cod sounds amazing…. I’ve always wanted to go there. My daughter Amy and I want to take a trip for her 21st birthday. We’ve always talked about driving down the entire east coast and just exploring for a few weeks. Her birthday is this September, and yet she just recently got married and moved to Florida. So now we are left wondering if we will still be able to go on our trip. You should definitely get away by yourself more. It helps boost the creativity of an artistic mind.

                      Liked by 1 person

                    7. trentpmcd Post author

                      It is a relaxing place,and the area is pretty.

                      In some ways it just seems bad timing for you! It would take a very understanding husband to let her go off for a week or two without him so soon after their marriage… I do hope you get to do the mother/daughter east cost trip soon, even if you don’t make her 21st birthday. I’m sure you’ll both enjoy it.

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  2. Britta

    All the guys in my college friend group are the definition of nerd…I loved going to bars with them and got drunk with them frequently. As a young woman, if I had to choose between a nerdy guy and a tough guy to feel safe with while drunk, I’d choose the nerdy guy. :)

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    1. trentpmcd Post author

      “In the wild, these non-aggressive creatures can be somewhat shy, but once their trust has been gained, they make for very loyal companions and their trademark trait, showing great passion and enthusiasm towards their intellectual pursuits, is often channeled towards those who have been accepted into their inner circle” ;) I get that. Nerdy guys aren’t known for taking advantage of people. Sometimes tough guys think they have to do certain things to live up to their persona.

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      1. Britta

        You are exactly, right. I’m also very good at seeing through facades (it’s the INFJ in me, if you’re familiar with Myers-Briggs), so personas don’t impress me. I like genuine, loyal, nerdy people. :)

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  7. Ocean Bream

    I like this, I really really like this. Honestly, I have done the same thing these girls did, and my most recent one was just last week at a dark and empty train station. I went and stood next to two guys talking about electric cars, because a creepy man who reeked of alcohol was following me around the platform. I stood as close to them as was polite and felt instantly safer. I wasn’t even drunk! Nice photo, full of the carefree freedom of youth of yore! :)

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    1. trentpmcd Post author

      Thanks. I know that sometimes women (and men) do things like that. There is protection in numbers and most people will help in that type of a situation. I had totally forgotten this episode until I read Lisa’s post about protecting drunken women.

      Right now a few people on FaceBook are discussing that photo. The person standing next to me is my brother (if that isn’t obvious ;) ) – a lot of good memories of those times!

      And thinking “good”, or perhaps “Goode”, I see you’ve started into The Old Mill. I hope you are enjoying it!

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