A Cold, Spring Morning

40 Replies
PHOTO PROMPT © Na’ama Yehuda

What a rough night.  It’s Spring, but still frigid, and last night’s rot-gut barely cut the edge before it was gone. I was shivering so much that I even spilled some of the precious fluid. 

Well, I have been shivering even when it is warm for a while, and sweating even when it’s freezing.  Stupid world.

Damn, though, it’s cold.  I can’t move, seem frozen to the spot.

I don’t remember coming to this garden, but all I see are flowers and people in heavy coats.

Here comes someone with a blanket.  Why did they put it over my face?

***

word count = 100

Friday Fictioneers is hosted by  Rochelle Wisoff-Fields.  This week’s prompt is here and uses a photo by @ Na’ama Yehuda. If you want to join or see other stories, go to the inlinkz linkup.

40 thoughts on “A Cold, Spring Morning”

  2. Rowena

    Interesting reading the story, the comments and your interpretation. I went straight to your interpretation. For me, the blanket over the face at the end was clear. That could only have one meaning for me. I had to look up ” rot-gut”. It’s not a term we use here, although it made perfect sense and is a great word. Plonk or poison. Don’t have much to do with that sort of thing. I rarely even drink coffee these days. Anyway, I enjoyed it, and it makes me wonder what happens when we die. As a Christian, I believe in the afterlife but how that pans out is life’s greatest mystery.
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. trentpmcd Post author

      Yeah, “rot gut” is typically super cheap, really awful booze, undrinkable by most. There are people who say ghosts are spirits that don’t know how to “make the crossing to the other side”, and I usually don’t ask what is meant by “the other side”. Like that movie, they are dead but don’t know they are dead.

      Thanks, Rowena.

      Like

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  6. Margaret

    Poor man. The disorientation he feels made me wonder what was going on – and the twist at the end was a big surprise. Fascinating to use this viewpoint. I like stories that do unexpected things.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply ↓
    1. trentpmcd Post author

      Thanks. I think having the narration be by a person who happens to be dead can be interesting, like the movie Sunset Blvd., only this is also a hint of “I see dead people; they don’t know they’re dead”.

      Liked by 1 person

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    1. trentpmcd Post author

      It is, though it is possible this guy is beyond incapacitated, or perhaps “permanently incapacitated” might be a better way of saying it…

      Like

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    1. trentpmcd Post author

      I think more than POV being a little disorientating, it is the tense – I wanted it in the present tense yet with past tense as he remembers the night before, so a mix of both. Thanks.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply ↓
    1. trentpmcd Post author

      Thanks, Shannon. My thought was a person drinking too much (as he has every night for years), passing out in the flowers and freezing to death. He’s one of those dead people the kid sees that doesn’t know he’s dead….

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply ↓
  12. msjadeli

    Oh no :( I feel so bad for the person who was left to die out in the elements. Who is to say one doesn’t retain awareness even as a corpse. Nicely articulated tale of sadness.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply ↓
    1. trentpmcd Post author

      I see dead people. They don’t know they’re dead…. I wasn’t thinking of that movie, but I won’t discount that there may be some awareness after a person passes away. Thanks.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply ↓
    1. trentpmcd Post author

      Yes, everyone likes spring flowers, even if they are dead. (I toyed with writing a zombie story about flowers, but liked this way better)

      Like

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